90: How do you respect money? How do you relate to money? Jim Dew shares key skills.

Author and Advisor to Entrepreneurs, Jim Dew, shares lots of great insights on money that many of us often make. Get ready to gain skills each of us can utilize in our lives immediately. Jim’s book “Beyond a Million” has been a game-changer in Mike Domitrz’s life and business.

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Jim’ BIO:
Jim Dew, Advisor To The Entrepreneur®, is the CEO of Dew Wealth Management. Jim has twenty-four years of experience building virtual family offices for entrepreneurs. He earned a BS in Mathematics from the University of Arizona and an MBA from Arizona State University. Jim is a Certified Financial Planner®, Chartered Financial Consultant®, and a Certified Private Wealth Advisor®. He has been featured in Inc, Entrepreneur, and Huffington Post magazines and is the author of “Beyond a Million: The Entrepreneur’s Playbook for Expanding Wealth, Freedom, and Time.”
 
 
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YOUR HOST: Mike Domitrz is the founder of The Center for Respect where he helps educational institutions, the US Military and businesses of all sizes create a culture of respect throughout their organizations. From addressing consent to helping corporations build a workplace free from fear (reducing sexual harassment and helping employees thrive by treating them with respect every day), Domitrz engages audiences by sharing skill sets they can implement into their lives immediately. As an author, trainer, keynote speaker and coach, Mike Domitrz loves working with leaders at all levels. Learn more at http://www.CenterForRespect.com

 

 

READ THE FULL TRANSCRIPTION of the EPISODE HERE:

 

Mike Domitrz:
Welcome to the Respect Podcast. I’m your host Mike Domitrz from mikespeaks.com, where we help organizations of all sizes, educational institutions, and the US military create a culture of respect, and respect is exactly what we discuss on this show. So let’s get started. This week I am so excited with the guest we have for you today. His book really helped transform one aspect of my life. So I want to dive right into this. For 24 years, Jim has advised elite entrepreneurs on how to manage their wealth through a virtual family office framework. And this is Jim Dew. Jim, thank you so much for joining me.

Jim Dew:
You’re welcome, Mike. It’s great to be on your podcast.

Mike Domitrz:
Absolutely. And you help people with respecting their finances and their financial goals and where they want to go. And so how does respect play an important role with money?

Jim Dew:
It really does, in a dramatic way. I think the first thing is people have to have respect for themselves as that relates to money. And often one of the things we’re not taught in school is anything about financial or wealth management matters and relationships, the two most important things that we have to do in our lives. So knowing who you are and what matters to you and how money relates to that is critical. And that I think is a deep level of respect for respecting yourself and your true goals and your true things that you want to achieve, in addition to how money can help you get there and not be a problem in your life. Because for many people money becomes a problem.

Mike Domitrz:
And what happens in child… Because you brought up something really important there. It’s not something we’re taught a lot about in school. You know, and even college friends would joke about, “I was never taught how to pay this or do that.” There are some schools that do it in some, but not overall how you view money and sometimes you can even learn that money’s bad, so people really get a negative connection to money. Where and how do you think these relationships are built?

Jim Dew:
They usually start very young and most people, I would say if you’re on this podcast today, you can probably envision, if you take a minute and think about it, a couple of moments in your childhood that defined how you feel or how you think about money. And for me, if I could just share my own, both my parents were depression babies. My mom just passed away a couple of months ago, she was 92, and my dad is 93 and still alive. So they both grew up very poor. So the only thing I learned from my father about money is you have to be very careful and you have to try to keep every penny, so be really frugal, money is hard to make and when you make it, you have to be super vigilant to make sure you don’t lose it.

Jim Dew:
Well, how that translated into my life is I heard these stories about the great depression and I thought being poor was an honorable thing. So when I was 16 years old, I have this vivid memory that I refused to let my mom buy me new tennis shoes. So my tennis shoes had holes in the sides. My socks would stick out. But I refused because I was trying to be frugal and make my dad proud, which of course my dad thought it was great until my sock started getting holes in them and I started ruining socks at which point my mom got really angry at my dad and said, “You have to make him let us buy him tennis shoes,” which is a weird thing for a 16 year old. But then my mom would give me this lecture and she would say, “Jim, it’s not a good thing to be poor. I was poor and your father was poor. And I can tell you it’s not a good thing to be poor. And by the way, you’re not poor. So quit acting like you’re poor because we are middle class.”

Jim Dew:
But I was trying to somehow identify with this honorable nature of being poor, and I had to change that in my mind, not only to be a good wealth manager, but also to be successful in my own life because money is a tool that when you respect it right, there’s so many things you can do with it that you cannot do if you’re poor. I’ve been able to do all kinds of things with my wife, Mimi and I, both from charitable things for children that means a lot to us, from helping my mother at times in her older age, to lifestyle things, experiences, joining groups like Genius Network that you and I are both involved in to meet other people, to expand my horizons, to become a bigger, better person than what I was in the past. All those things came out of learning that money can be a really good thing and used the right way, it’s actually much better to have money than not to have money.

Mike Domitrz:
Well, you used a great example there of trying to show I can live without and people listening might think, “Yeah, but there’s no harm in that. There’s no harm in being frugal with your money.” So how do you respond to that?

Jim Dew:
So for me, I would say that what it did is it allowed me to put a limit on myself financially. My first job when I was in college, I said, “What can I do that will make a difference that has no regard for making money?” So guess what profession I chose?

Mike Domitrz:
I’m going to take a wild guess here. Teaching.

Jim Dew:
Yeah. So I became a math teacher. That was my first job out of college. And you can ask Mimi. Mimi and I were dating at the time and she jokes around that she thought she was going to have to find a way to support us, because I couldn’t care less about making money. But because of that, and by the way, being a math teacher for five years was a tremendous opportunity. I’m glad I did it. I learned a lot. I feel like I made a difference with some younger people that I had a chance to touch. That being said though, I also put myself in a box. I didn’t want to look at anything where I could actually make a lot of money because I put that in my mind that being frugal is one thing, but people who make money, then there’s all these problems and then people get arrogant, and I just thought rich people were bad people.

Jim Dew:
So because of that, I limited my ability to grow as a person and also grow financially. And so I think that’s where it’s a problem. It’s fine to be frugal. And in fact, too many people aren’t frugal enough. They spend everything they make and they have nothing to show for it 10 years later. On the flip side though, people who are merely frugal and put themselves a cap on their potential, and this is both as a human being, but also their financial potential. So sometimes people will think money’s bad. Rich people are bad. So they don’t look for opportunities to actually grow wealth and grow finances. But when you do that and you realize it’s a tool that can be used for good in the world and getting your own life, then it opens these doors to all these things that you can do that you couldn’t do before.

Jim Dew:
I mean, look at Bill Gates, what he’s done with his foundation all over the world. If he was a poor person or even if he had a meager financial position, he couldn’t affect all those lives. So money can be a good thing. And I think being frugal is good, staying within your means, but also being allowed to dream a little bit and think about, “Okay, if I wasn’t so scared of protecting and keeping money, what could I do on the side of actually making money and growing money?”

Mike Domitrz:
Yeah, and there’s so many extremes here because there’s also the person who gets locked in. “I’m making money.” Deepak Chopra, I once heard say, “If you’re a millionaire and you’re worried about your next dollar, you’re as broke as the homeless person.”

Jim Dew:
That’s fantastic.

Mike Domitrz:
And that always stuck with me. So how do people get to that place and how do they get out of that place?

Jim Dew:
So one thing I think people have to ask themselves is when it comes to material things, are you owning those things or are they owning you? And are you looking to material things to fulfill something in yourself that you think is missing? So I see people, they may go shopping or they may buy a fancy car or they might buy jewelry or a huge house, and if you’re doing that because it’s going to make you feel better and somehow complete you as a person, it’s never going to happen. And that’s why you see sometimes people who make more money, they have to make more, they have to make more, and they’re always comparing to their friends, “Oh, well that guy has a better car than me now, or she has a better house than I do.” Whatever it might be. Comparing yourself to someone else is a recipe for unhappiness.

Jim Dew:
And not only that, it doesn’t do you any good. I think tying money and goals, whether you want to be a billionaire or a millionaire or you just want to be comfortable, but doing that in a way that also ties in to what really matters to you. Because I haven’t met anyone who said, “If you could just put a blank slate up on the wall and tell me what would you want to achieve in this life? What would you want to leave behind? What would you want to create or do or who would you like to help?” Nobody says, “If I could just get a Lamborghini, I’d be fulfilled. That would be it.” Any yet, sometimes people are chasing buying a Lamborghini that they somehow think will solve their problems. So I think the other thing you need to do is you need to have caring people who respect you and who you respect, who can keep you grounded.

Jim Dew:
So if you look at all these professional athletes and famous actors and actresses who ended up broke, a lot of times they don’t have advisors around them, which could be friends, it could be family, it could be professionals like myself, around them who can tell them the truth and who can say, “That’s not really you. Why are you chasing that? That’s not going to help you get to where you want to go.” And keeping them grounded in that framework. I have those people in my life. I would imagine you do too, but anyone who’s successful financially has at least one, two, or three people in their lives who keep them grounded. Because if you’re surrounded by people who are just chasing more money, more money, or “rich people are bad, let’s be frugal,” I don’t think then you end up actually fulfilling something that gives you a great position in life as far as how you feel about yourself and the world and achieving what we all are after, which is fulfillment.

Mike Domitrz:
So how does somebody shift their mindset to that healthy understanding of money? That money can allow me to help others. In my line of work. You’ll hear this approach, which is, “As long as I’m helping lives, money doesn’t matter.”

Jim Dew:
Yeah. The problem with that is eventually you’re going to need money just to sustain yourself, and I think our first responsibility is taking care of ourselves. I look at America and I think if everyone just said, “Number one, I’m going to take care of myself and make sure I’m okay, and then if I can help someone else or take care of someone else, then it just gets better from there.” The first thing that has to happen is I think some soul searching about who you are and what matters in your life, and that may sound funny when we talk about money, but it’s very important. The other thing is most of us have grown up with some sort of bias about money that clouds our judgment, so it’s hard to get clarity, and I think the two most important things are awareness and clarity. You have to get those two things lined up.

Jim Dew:
I like to say that when I was a kid, when I was a little kid and I thought there was a monster in the closet, my mom would come in and what would she do?

Mike Domitrz:
She’d open the closet. Prove to you that there’s no monster.

Jim Dew:
Yeah, she turned on the light, right? Open the closet, turn on the light, there’s no monster here. So I think with money, sometimes I say you have to turn on the light. A lot of times people are afraid to look at their finances or their money situation because it’s that monster in the closet. But generally when you turn the light on those things, they’re not as scary as you think they are when the closet door is closed. So I tell people that whether you’re capable of doing that or you need to have someone else, a friend, a family member, your spouse, an expert, a professional, come in and go, “Okay, let’s just put this everything out on the table and let’s shine a light on this. And then let’s craft how we can use your current financial situation, your future potential opportunities, and who you are and what you really want to achieve, and how do we match those up in a way that feels good to you.”

Jim Dew:
Because a lot of times people are chasing the bigger house or the nicer car just because they’re not aware that that’s not going to do it for them, and when they really sit down and they go, “You know what? That’s really not going to change my life in a positive way.” And I’m not saying that if you have the wherewithal to do everything you want and be who you want, you want to buy a Lamborghini too, no problem. However, if that’s your driving force, then I think you end up either unhappy or you try to escape through drugs and alcohol, or you tried to escape through other ways of just ignoring the truth of what’s going on in your life. So shining a light, whether you’re worth millions and millions of dollars or you’re just starting out or you’re somewhere in between, or you have a lot of debt. No matter what it is, shining a light on that and saying, “Okay, where am I today? Where do I want to get to and what do I need to do to make that happen?”

Jim Dew:
And if you start looking for those things, you’ll find the world will open up. You’ll start noticing books that will help you. You’ll start noticing podcasts you can listen to. You’ll start noticing friends that have a like mindset that you can connect with to help you do better.

Mike Domitrz:
Well, your book was fantastic. It’s called Beyond a Million: The Entrepreneur’s Playbook for Expanding Wealth, Freedom, and Time. It was awesome, Jim. In there you have a very unique concept. Well, unique as in a lot of people don’t realize it, I think. And that is when you look at billionaires, they don’t have a financial advisor and that’s it. What I love is your spoke system. I just think it’s brilliant, which is if you think of a bicycle… This how I interpret it. You think of a bicycle, and let’s say there were 12 spokes and people who are billionaires have literally 12 different areas of their finances that may be managed. It could be a tax person, it could be accountant, it could be the financial advisor, but there can be these 12. It could be their insurance. These 12. And most people put themselves in the middle controlling all the spokes, but the really successful billionaires have a person called the wealth manager in the middle that runs all of that, because that’s what that person’s an expert in. The odds that any of us are going to be an expert in it when that’s not what we do for a living are slim.

Mike Domitrz:
What I loved about that was how all of us could step back and go, “Hmm, who could be that in my life? Who could be a supportive person in my life even if I’m nowhere in that world, even if I’m not a millionaire. How do I find that person?” That’s how I interpreted for me. And I thought it was powerful. Is that an accurate depiction?

Jim Dew:
Excellent. I should put you on my marketing team. It was great.

Mike Domitrz:
So what I did is I went to my financial advisor and said, “Can you be this for me? And now I was fortunate because he heard what I was talking about, he’s like, “Well that’s what we want to be for you.” I’m excited we’re able to open this conversation up and really explore that because I think you bring up a really important point about the light. I love that you said whether you’re struggling with money, having very little, or if you’re a millionaire, because I think you would reveal… There are millionaires who are even more millions in debt.

Jim Dew:
Absolutely. I meet entrepreneurs all the time who have a persona, public persona that they’re extremely wealthy and successful in their life is perfect, online. And they come into my office and sit down. You know, the first thing they say to me, “Jim, I’m not as rich as people think I am.” They’re embarrassed. They’re embarrassed because they know they haven’t paid attention to their wealth management and their finances and they come clean with me. But no matter what your stress level is or based on what your situation is, a lot of people who don’t have money think, “You know, if I had tens of millions of dollars, I’d have no problems.”

Jim Dew:
But sometimes money can be an enormous problem and can create all kinds of problems for people with money. I know that’s hard to understand if you don’t have money, but either way it can be a problem, and having a healthy relationship with money is important. And then as you say, I always tell people your structure is the most important aspect of your wealth management. And if your structure, like you’re alluding to, I call it the financial flat tire, where you’ve got these advisors that you’ve picked up over the years, you might have an insurance person you picked up, you picked up an account, you might have an attorney that did a will or a trust for you, you might have an investment advisor. They may not all be A players that you may have B, C and even D players on your team. They’re probably not talking to each other or collaborating on your behalf. And what’s worse is you’re in the middle and you don’t speak tax or legal or insurance or investment languages and those you have to speak every day to be fluent.

Jim Dew:
So then it becomes this wonky financial flat tire. And what I like is what I call the functional wealth wheel or the virtual family office where you have someone in the middle, billionaires would call it their family office CEO, I call it for our clients, the wealth manager in the middle. You have A players around, so they’re all A players. They’re all vetted and continuously monitored for their ability to continue to add value in your life. They’re coordinating and collaborating on your behalf, and then you have one contact person who speaks all the languages, so then you become like a pedal on that wheel and a pedal can effortlessly move a big wheel and you have one point of contact. Of course you’re going to have meetings with the other professionals from time to time.

Jim Dew:
But that scenario or that structure will work for anyone. It just takes more legwork if you’re not at a financial level, like a billionaire who can just hire them all as employees. Or I would say like my clients who can hire me to do all of that for them. But some people don’t fall in those two categories. You can still do it yourself. It just takes more legwork and you have to find the person who’s willing to be in the middle and then you just hold them accountable and make sure you have a great relationship and you communicate a lot.

Mike Domitrz:
Yeah, absolutely. And I am being transparent. I’m not at that level, and yet my financial advisors will say, “Let’s talk about how to make this work.” I think a lot of times we just forget to ask the people who are already maybe in our system. One of the spokes might be the person, like a financial advisor was for us, in helping you do that. Because I’ve made that mistake in the past where I get caught up in that I’m so mission focused and I want to be out there, I want to do the speaking, I want to be doing in reaching people and making a difference that, “Oh, as long as I’m out there doing enough, I won’t have to worry about that.” And what happened is you can have to worry about that at times, and suddenly what people I don’t think realize is if you’re not on top of this, you’re not lighting it up. It can take away your joy, finances can, of the work you love doing. Let’s say you’re doing the work you love, it’s mission-based, but you’re coming home every day worried about your finances, how joyful can you be? It takes away a lot of it. And so staying on top of it can make such a huge difference.

Jim Dew:
Absolutely. Yeah, that’s very true. I created this thing called wealth mastery matrix where I came up with the characters of where I see most people fall into. If you want me to take a second, I can kind of describe each of them.

Mike Domitrz:
Yeah, that’d be great.

Jim Dew:
So the first is where wealth management is easy, but the results are usually poor and I call that the ostrich, and the ostrich lives by ignore and avoid. So the ostrich will say things like, “I’m too busy, I’m just going to keep my head down and just keep making more money and everything will work out for itself.” That’s the ostrich. Easy because you’re ignoring, but the results are usually poor. Then there’s the juggler, and the juggler is someone who really doesn’t have any great advisers and who’s trying to manage everything himself or herself. And for the juggler, as you can imagine, it’s very hard and the results are usually poor and the juggler will say things like, “Gosh, Jim, all these things I’m trying to keep track of, I really have to, it’s all up to me. I really don’t have a lot of help.” That’s the juggler and those results are usually poor as well.

Jim Dew:
Then there’s the air traffic controller and this is where you have someone who has excellent advisors, so A players around them, but they’re in the middle managing all of those advisors, and the air traffic controller can actually get excellent wealth management results, but it’s very stressful, it’s very hard, and just like an air traffic controller, if you’re not paying attention all the time, something could crash. And then ultimately I like to get clients to the point where I talk about the virtual family office, or that functional wealth wheel where they have someone else in the middle who’s an expert at knowing all of these different areas who can help manage the advisors and then your job becomes easy. The results can be excellent and then you can go off and focus on living a great life, spending more time with the people you love, creating a vision or dreams about helping others, building your business in ways you haven’t built it before.

Jim Dew:
Because every entrepreneur I’ve taken through this kind of journey, in the end they tell me they’re surprised at how much they underestimated how this was holding down their business, their personal life, their relationships. Because even if you’re the ostrich, at some level you know you’re not paying attention and that’s going to stress you out in some way, that’s going to distract you in some way, and I want people to live their greatest life and spend the time with the people they love and make a difference and build wealth.

Mike Domitrz:
I love your approach. It’s beautiful, it’s caring, and it’s such a healthy viewpoint. What is it the key step people need to take to experience a transformation for respecting money? We talked about that earlier about how people can easily learn bad habits. What’s needed to make the shift, so no matter who you are, whatever personality you are, you can value and respect money?

Jim Dew:
Number one is I would say being clear of your values. What kind of values do you want in your life and what do you represent? Because if your value is generosity, then think about how money, maybe not today, maybe you’re not ready for that today, but create a vision of how you can create enough wealth where you can do things that are generous, that help others, that would really fulfill you. If it’s honesty, think about, “If my value is honesty, am I being honest with myself about money? Am I being honest with my spouse about money? Am I being honest about my dreams, about what I would like to do or have or create with my money?” So I think step number one is become really clear and aware of your personal values and how you want to live your life. And it might just be reinforcing how you’ve been living your life and just bring it to your attention.

Jim Dew:
Then say, “Okay, what are my values about money? How do I think about money?” And then compare those lists. Because if you want to be generous, but then you feel when you look at money, you go, “I’m cheap. I’ve done this, that, and the other that were really cheap. I stiffed that server.” Well then you’re incongruent. You’ve got to figure a way to get those things to match up. So first your personal values. Second, how do you think about money. And then third, combine those two. And if you need help, because a lot of people do, elicit a friend who you think has a really good feel for values and for money, or a loved one, or your spouse or a professional. Go to a professional that you can just sit down with. Could be your accountant, could be an attorney, could be your financial advisor and just say, “Hey, could we just talk about money and help me understand, here are my values. Tell me what you’re seeing in our experience together about how my values relate to money and what could I do differently or maybe coach me a little bit.”

Jim Dew:
Because sometimes just having another set of eyes and someone you can bounce ideas off of. Someone who’s not judgemental, someone who’s not going to… You don’t want to go to the uncle that’s very frugal and is going to tell you, “That’s stupid. Why are you doing this?” You want someone who’s going to listen and empathize and go back and forth so that you can get a good understanding of that. Because really, as I said, awareness and clarity is the first step to really achieving anything.

Mike Domitrz:
If you’re in a marriage or in a relationship, having a partner who you two are on the same page is huge on this, on respecting money. It doesn’t mean you have to have all the same views, but on the same page of respecting. You have such a great partner and I’ve been fortunate to meet Mimi, and absolutely you two make such a fantastic team. How do you think respect of a relationship plays into all of this?

Jim Dew:
It’s huge and I’m not an expert on divorce, but I would bet that if you looked, the two major causes of divorce would be infidelity and finances. I think that that would… I don’t know which is bigger, but finances is a huge part of divorce. So understanding how each of you feel about money, what’s important about money and so that you can help each other achieve what you want to achieve. So in my marriage, so Mimi and I just celebrated our 27th wedding anniversary and our first [crosstalk 00:24:07]-

Mike Domitrz:
Congratulations.

Jim Dew:
Thanks Mike. I appreciate that. And I know you know Mimi, she’s the best thing ever happened to me. I couldn’t live a thousand lives and hope to meet someone as amazing as Mimi. But it’s interesting. So her background, she was born in Korea and her family immigrated here when she was about five years old, and her dad believed, as an immigrant from Korea, making money in America is the easiest thing. Anybody can make money in America. Are you kidding? Just go out and make money. It’s the easiest thing in the world. On the other hand, her dad also was a spender, so he didn’t believe in saving because he always believe you can just make more money.

Jim Dew:
On the other hand, my parents, which I alluded to earlier, my dad was like, “Making money is really hard in this country. And any money you make, you got to squirrel it away and be super careful and don’t take any risks and put it in the bank,” and all those kinds of things. So when we came together, Mimi was the one that got me to start my own company in 1999 she just said, “You have to do this.” So she was fearless about entrepreneurial risk. She was fearless about, “What if we fail? What if we don’t make money? What if we lose our house?” She’s like, “Don’t worry about that. It’s America. You’re talented, you’re going to make money.”

Jim Dew:
On the other hand, I brought to the table, “Okay, I’m with that, but let’s not spend all our money. Squirrel money away so that we can also build something up. So that we have this thing called financial security.” So for me, number one was I want financial security. For her, she was like, “I want to help people.” She’s a huge giver. “I want to give to charities and help others. I want to have a great lifestyle and I want to grow and make a lot of money.” So together we found our strengths and weaknesses and we kind of puzzle piece those things together where I calmed down a little bit on the risk of spending money on starting a business and those kinds of things, and she calmed down a little bit on the… “Okay, we’re going to work this out so that enough money is going off to the side so I feel good,” but we’re still doing things that makes her feel good or we’re giving money away or we’re doing life sale in enjoying, you know, our, our wealth and our growth.

Jim Dew:
So that’s something that we started very early when we were dating, believe it or not, in college. We had a very serious talk about everything, including finances, and she told me her family history and how she felt about money. And I told her mine and we said, “Hey, you know what? Even though our parents were so different, they were both part right and they were both part wrong. And if we could take the best of each and meld it together and our relationship, I think we’ve got something.”

Jim Dew:
And so that’s been throughout our marriage that we follow that kind of guidance and we sit down and talk and share and we negotiate. There are times when she’s like, “Hey, we should spend this on the business.” And I go, “Ah, makes me uncomfortable.” And then we talk it through and figure out what is the best answer. And usually we come to a better answer than if I was on my own or she was on her own. But the key I think is constantly communicating because over the last 30 years, things change, things evolve, relationships change, and if you’re not continually reconnecting on the money issue, it could definitely get out of control or into a ditch, or you might have resentment between you that gets so large that you can’t bridge the gap and come back together.

Mike Domitrz:
Yeah. I’ve seen that with friends where one clearly controls the money. It’s not just that they’re managing the money, they control and that can create resentment because the other one’s left powerless in ways. So I think that’s so important that you brought that up. Thank you. And I feel the same way. While I may think, “Oh, this is the right thing to do.” When I talk it out with Karen, even though Karen May push back and I’m like, “No, why are you pushing back?” In the end it’s always better when I hit throw that out and get to hear the feedback and we make it together. Absolutely. But do you find the same thing though, at times, you’re like, or Mimi is like, “No, no, no, no. I know what I want. I know what I want.” But then you’re like a day later, “I needed to hear that.”

Jim Dew:
Absolutely. Yeah, it happens all the time, you know, and then we have some general rules like any purchase over… Maybe we should revisit this. But it used to always be any purchase over $500 we have a conversation so that nobody’s out buying something because it would… It freaks me out if all of a sudden I realized we just spent $2,000 on something. Even if it’s… I don’t know what would cost 2000 around the house. A couple of washing machines or something, I don’t know. But, but even if it was necessary, it triggers something from my childhood and from my parents and the Great Depression that just money going out flips me out unless I’ve been able to rationally think it through. So she’ll come to me and say, “We need a new washer and dryer.” “Okay, what kind do we need? Let’s go shopping for it,” whatever.

Jim Dew:
And then we have a conversation. Then I negotiate because Mimi is so nice to people that… This is a funny side story, but we were, when we remodeled our kitchen a few years ago, we got all new appliances, and we go down to the appliance shop, and I’m negotiating with the guy on the price of the appliances and Mimi takes the other guy’s side. She goes, “Honey, I think the price is fair by now.” And I’m going, “Honey, you’re negotiating against me with a sales guy.” That’s how nice she is, so I said, “Honey, when we’re negotiating, trust me, he knows the numbers better than me. He’s not going to sell me the stuff at a loss, just let me negotiate with him.” So we have that kind of a funny conversation that she will negotiate against me because she wants to be fair to the salesperson.

Mike Domitrz:
That’s hilarious. That’s awesome. Jim, I want to make sure everybody can find you. It’s dewwealth.com. Dew like honeydew, D-E-W. Dewwealth.com and wealthmasterymatrix.com. Jim, this has been awesome. Thank you so much for joining us.

Jim Dew:
It’s been great, Mike, and by the way, any of the listeners, if you ever have a chance to see Mike present in person, he’s a phenomenal presenter and a phenomenal speaker. I had that opportunity a couple of weeks ago and I still remember it, so I learned a lot from watching that and I was inspired by watching him. So if you have a chance, see him in person.

Mike Domitrz:
Well that means a lot to me. Thank you so much Jim. For our listeners, you know what’s next? It is question of the week. Before I answer this week’s question of the week, I’d love to ask you a question. Would you please subscribe to this podcast, the Respect Podcast with Mike Domitrz? By subscribing you can make a huge impact. Now you might be wondering, “Mike, how does my subscribing to your podcast make a huge impact?” Well, here’s how. For every person that subscribes, it raises the rankings of the show in the search engines. So for people who care about respect like yourself, when they’re doing a search for podcast, they’re more likely to find this show, thus providing an awesome opportunity for us to spread more respect around this world, and all you do is hit subscribe under your podcast. Plus, the second benefit is by subscribing, you automatically get every episode right into your phone or whatever device you’re listening to the podcast on. It happens automatically. So subscribing also makes your life easier.

Mike Domitrz:
Now let’s get into this week’s question of the week. Oh, and by the way, you can always ask your questions of the week by joining us on Facebook in our discussion group. It’s called the Respect Podcast discussion group. Go there on Facebook and ask whatever questions you would like me to answer and or address in this segment of the show, and then listen to each episode to find out when your question is included. This week’s question of the week is for you instead of for me. The question is, what are ways that you practice treating other human beings with respect on a daily basis? I’d love for you to answer this on our Facebook page, so we have the Respect Podcast discussion group, you can go there, you can join the group, and I’d love to hear ways you practice respect in your daily life for yourself and for others. Look forward to seeing your answers on our Facebook page in the Respect Podcast discussion group. Thanks.

Mike Domitrz:
Do you know what I would love? I would love to hear your answer to this week’s question of the week. So would you please answer what your answer would have been if you were asked that question today on the show, all you do is go to our Facebook page. We have a special group where we have these discussions called the Respect Podcast discussion group, so the Respect Podcast discussion group, and share with us what would your answer have been to this week’s question of the week, and take a moment, post us a new question for future episodes. What question would you like to hear me answer on an upcoming episode? That’s all done on Facebook in our special group, which is the Respect Podcast discussion group. Can’t wait to see you there.

Mike Domitrz:
Thank you for joining us in this episode of the Respect Podcast, exploring work love and life. And this episode, like every episode is brought to you by our organization, the Center for Respect, which you can find at centerforrespect.com. And of course you can find me your host, Mike Domitrz at mikespeaks.com. Thank you so much for joining us.

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